A Southern Girl's Guide to Forgiveness

"Someone hurt you; it's just that simple and that complicated. But remaining angry, and being unable to forgive, means continuing to hurt ... yourself and others.

I think people are hesitant to forgive because of pride. Pride is important - you need to have a sense of pride in yourself and your convictions. But, pride can also be dangerous. I've seen too many relationships ruined because of pride. I've walked that fine line at times,too. 

So when you feel something, really feel it for all that it is. Don’t brush it off

Respond to the person. In my own experience, what we immediately feel after something, anything, has happened is usually irrational and irreverent. Don’t act on these emotions right away.

Then, let it go. I think people forget that forgiveness frees you.

A few weeks ago, I sat in class and listened to my professor lecture for 3 hours about
memory. 'Forgetting' he said, 'is a necessary consequence of memory, and it usually happens without notice. Our mind functions in a way that we jump from one moment to the next, with little control over the path we so choose to take.

History, on the other hand, takes what is normally floating out there in a totally disorganized way, and makes it into a clear story.

Memory is history in motion, and its much less easily defined. And it's boundaries aren’t easy to map out. Our memories of relationships, of events, of periods of time in our lives, are often muddled by imagination, emotion, and a range of nostalgia.'

Memories are half of what constitutes life, so do yourself a favor and create the most positive memories possible. Choose to apologize, to forgive, to move on – that affirmative memory will endure."

This is part 2 in a two-part series. The first is titled A Southern Girl's Guide to Apologizing

[ Sarah Cutler is a native of Alpharetta, Georgia. She is currently a senior at the University of San Diego studying Communications and Philosophy.
While at school, one of the things she misses most about Georgie is beautiful southern family "My grandmother is the epitome of grace, and she makes my all-time favorite version of sweet tea. She tosses in a handful of mint leaves from her backyard and nothing tastes better. These are what my family visits are like at home: sitting out on the patio, drink in hand, chatting about life."]


  1. oh wow, i love love this. if memories are what constitute half your life well then, yes, let's choose to make them as wonderful as possible--huzzah. love it.

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  3. Very true, I like how you express this! :-)


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