inertia.

Inertia is the idea that matter continues in its current state of motion. Without an outside force, what is still will remain still. What moves will continue moving.

When I buckled my seatbelt on the plane, I peered out at Portland for the last time. I thought : how did I do this? how did I get here? And it was that word that returned to me. Inertia.

I loved my life. My city, my friends, living with my sister, my bus driver, my yoga studio, my apartment in the hippest neighborhood and painted Martha Stewart blue. If there hadn't been some sort of great outside force, I wouldn't have left.

What is still will remain still.

I thought of the line from We Bought a Zoo (which I persuaded my Dad to rent when I was visiting him the weekend before) :  "You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it."

He's right about bravery. It doesn't take a lot; it hasn't taken courage the whole time. Really, just twenty seconds when I commited in February. Time passed and the inertia had started. The rest came all on it's own. Then, it only made sense that I would leave my job on this day, and my apartment on another. It didn't feel like a decision. It just felt like the next step. The momentum carried me to it. Even though - when each day came - I didn't feel ready. I wanted to stay.

What is moving will continue moving.

The plane made the wide turn to the straightway - the long stretch for picking up speed. We idled for a second before it started shaking. Faster and faster until the wing flaps pointed upward. The wheels stopped grating on the ground. As we headed for the cloud-cover, the city became smaller.  In a rush of white, it was gone.

12 comments:

  1. Beautifully said! Good luck on this new adventure :)

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  2. SAM! ugh! I got the chills reading this. and then I wanted to get moving on everything in my life that was still. so excited to continue reading about your journey.

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  3. This may be my favorite post you have written. So dead on and profound.

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  4. can't wait to come visit you.

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  5. Love this! Now, I want to rent that movie. Good luck on your new journey. Can't wait to read all about it.

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  6. miss you already. glad you keep this blog so i can stay connected to your thoughts and photographs. you are such an open and witty and talented and motivated lady. i wish i would have had more time with you but trust that you're onto great things.
    <3

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  7. just found your blog and i love it. good luck on your new adventure. i look forward to continue reading. oh, and We Bought A Zoo? SOO good. love that quote! xox

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  8. I'm glad you captured this moment. These moments you describe - that's all we got.

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  9. You write beautifully and I Love the quote on the picture too. Hope this is a great beginning for you too! :)

    ❤Not Just My Allegories❤

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  10. i have read & re-read this post a few times. you've captured such deep feelings & experiences into just a few paragraphs, & it really moves me. i love your writing.

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    1. Thank you so much, Lauren. The fleeting nature of the internet is sometimes kind of hard to deal with. As they say "you're only as good as your last blog post." It's a really wonderful feeling to write something that someone returns to.

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Thank you so much for commenting, Darling Reader! I read + love each and every one of them. (Anonymous commenting has been turned off due to robots)

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